Dassi's No-Makeup Challenge Weekend: Embracing the Me-ness
Friday: Getting pumped for shabbos! (Even tho I'm still allowed no makeup) having 2 very close friends stay with me is exciting, and the thought of greeting them fresh-faced isn't turning out to be the daunting task I thought it would be. I'm beginning to be less aware of my bare look. But don't get me wrong; I LOVE MAKEUP. I don't plan on always going bare after this challenge, but I feel like I'm on the verge of an epiphany... About which face I choose to show the world the most, and which I face I choose to call "me."
Unfortunately, 30 seconds before I lit candles, I ran to my room and (gasp) I applied a small amount of mascara to my lashes. As soon as I got to my friends house, it was brought to my attention that I was, yes, wearing makeup. It was ALSO brought to my attention that I was allowed one piece of makeup for shabbos. Phew! I'm in the clear! Truth is, I went through a back and forth with myself before putting it on: "The point is to be bare for 10 days and embrace the bareness. But I might meet a guy there. But I wanna be the REAL me. But part of the real me consists of wearing makeup. But Shabbos is a holy day, shouldn't I be my purest and not covered? But I also want to loo put together. But, but, but!!!" My feelings of being "put together" overruled. Mascara it was!
After shabbos, I made havdalah in front of a bunch of people! Voluntarily! Now I'm DEFINITELY not the type to do this. Ever. Or make kiddush for everyone (which I did once before, and made shabbos day kiddush by night. Case in point.) Or be the first at karaoke (must have at least one drink in my system first.) I'm for sure comfortable enough to speak in front of people, or tell a story to a massive group of children, or go for an interview. But something holy and connecting? Them's private things. Thank Gd I'm a girl!! (Wait, with no makeup?!) Though it passed quickly, my train of thought went from horse-and-buggy speed to bullet train speed. I just did something to connect with my creator that I NEVER get to do: and I did it with my "me" face. Raising the physical and worldly up to meet the holy and intangible. Now THAT was powerful.
Went out saturday night with some friends to dinner, and I was really feeling at peace with my new look. Its funny because saturday night is when I wear the most makeup. I didn't feel deprived at all.
I had a wedding to attend tonight, and I
was allowed a full face! Woohoo!
Sunday: I'm beginning to be more comfortable in my skin, literally. I was seriously not convinced that this challenge would turn out to be so self-reflective, but y'know what? It really is. Its true I am a very confident person with makeup. And waddaya know, my level of confidence hasn't wavered. I may be more conscious of my naked face, but I'm no less confident. I had a wedding to attend tonight, and I was allowed a full face! Woohoo! This was very exciting. As I applied, I felt like a completely different person. Not in a negative way, and not in a positive way. Just in a very "aware" sort of way. When I returned home, and began to wash my makeup off before bed, it was a surprising relief. I felt like "ahhh. now I can breath!" Instead of the usual "AHHH! Who the hell is that?!"